I Bet Mitt Romney...

I bet if you say Bloody Romney three times in the mirror with the lights out, Mitt Romney will pop out of the mirror and take away your basic rights as a woman.

I bet Mitt Romney would interview Tina Fey or Mindy Kaling only with questions about what it’s like to be a woman in a ‘boy’s club’.

I bet Mitt Romney answers “yes this is he” when someone calls his house and asks if “Mitt Romney is available”.

I bet Mitt Romney says he’s “gotta quit smokin’ these things” while smoking a cigarette.

I bet Mitt Romney insisted that he needed the footlong sub because the six inch was way too small but then only wound up eating half the footlong anyway while commenting, “Wow, that was bigger than I expected.  Remind me to get the six inch next time.”  

I bet Mitt Romney is thinking Arby’s.

I bet Mitt Romney is one of those people you have to get use to.

I bet Mitt Romney asks her to buy the condoms

I bet Mitt Romney rants about how High School Musical isn’t a musical every time something reminds him of it, even though you never said it was.

I bet Mitt Romney was the one paging biggie at 5:46 in the morning crack of dawn.